I've been meaning to write these thoughts down for a few days/weeks. I want to be more and do more (now!). Since I've come back home, most things have returned to the state they used to be. I remember thinking and saying how I didnt want to return to the same life. I'm not saying that I am unhappy about my life just that there are many things I would like to improve on mainly ... lack of employment, just lack of focus, and lack of real friendships. I want to go out and do things. I know that the biggest road blocks are just all in my head and caring what people think. I want to not give a hoot and start living and just be. I want to be putting myself out there.
I hate to think about things or most of the time I am just living for the 'day', this has to stop. I've been worried about being personal online about writing my feelings but as I've decided to work on not caring ... I want to start blogging about my mission to be earning a living, to move out and move in with my partner, to gain more out of life. Its hard to explain whats been holding me back and I know its just this feeling that I'm not good enough or like the others.
Taken right before I wrote this because it just didn't feel like a post without a picture, with my "C" from Spain wearing my backup glasses.